Old Lady Cruising


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About 2 years ago we were on a cruise through the western Mediterranean aboard a Princess liner. At dinner we noticed an elderly
lady sitting alone along the rail of the grand stairway in the main dining
room. I also noticed that all the staff, ships officers, waiters, busboys,
etc., all seemed very familiar with this lady. I asked our waiter whom the
lady was expecting to be told she owned the line, but he said he only knew
that she had been on board for the last four cruises, back to back.

 

As we left the dining room one evening I caught her eye and stopped to
say hello. We chatted and I said, “I understand you’ve been on this ship
for the last four cruises”. She replied, “Yes, that’s true.” I stated, “I
don’t understand?”

 

She replied without a pause, “It’s cheaper than a nursing home”.

 

Here’s the proof — when I get old and feeble, I am going to get on a Princess Cruise Ship.

 

The average cost for a nursing home is $200 per day. I have checked on
reservations at Princess and I can get a long term discount and senior
discount price of $135 per day. That leaves $65 a day for:

 

1. Gratuities which will only be $10 per day.

 

2. I will have as many as 10 meals a day if I can waddle to the
restaurant, or I can have room service (which means I can have breakfast in bed
every day of the week).

 

3. Princess has as many as three swimming pools, a workout room, free
washers and dryers, and shows every night.

 

4. They have free toothpaste and razors, and free soap and shampoo.

 

5. They will even treat you like a customer, not a patient. An extra $5
worth of tips will have the entire staff scrambling to help you.

 

6. I will get to meet new people every 7 or 14 days.

 

7. TV broken? Light bulb need changing? Need to have the mattress
replaced? No Problem! They will fix everything and apologize for your
inconvenience.

 

8. Clean sheets and towels every day, and you don’t even have to ask for them.

 

9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip you are on Medicare.
If you fall and break a hip on the Princess ship they will upgrade you to a
suite for the rest of your life.

 

Now hold on for the best! Do you want to see South America, the Panama
Canal, Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, Asia, or name where you want to go?

 

Princess will have a ship ready to go. So don’t look for me in a nursing
home, just call shore to ship.

 

P. S. And don’t forget, when you die, they just dump you over the side at
no charge.

Saw this before, so funny, and TRUE..

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  • 2 weeks later...

It was funny in an intended way. The feeble old lady of the joke cherishes things that a white, male, young American cares about. An old lady avoids a workout room, dreads a swimming pool, doesn't and cannot eat 10 meals a day, and might die from sea sickness alone. Also, seeing South America, the Panama Canal, Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, and [a small portion of eastern] Asia is an American dream stereotype.

 

But most importantly, razors are for Western men!

On 27/07/2022 at 03:39, Dick Montage said:

No, it’s not true. Ever been on a cruise?

Explain what is the issue?

 

In America nursing homes are damn expensive - I can see how this will work.

 

I also know a bunch of elderly who really do spend most of the year on a ship because of convenience and cost.

 

Where do You see the fault?

 

Princess courses are luxury and yet they cost similar to an average nursing home.

 

If you are old but mobile and reasonably healthy - it makes perfect sense. 

 

  • Thanks 1
On 10/08/2022 at 11:48, Fleet Command said:

It was funny in an intended way. The feeble old lady of the joke cherishes things that a white, male, young American cares about. An old lady avoids a workout room, dreads a swimming pool, doesn't and cannot eat 10 meals a day, and might die from sea sickness alone. Also, seeing South America, the Panama Canal, Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, and [a small portion of eastern] Asia is an American dream stereotype.

 

But most importantly, razors are for Western men!

Not all, though..

On 27/07/2022 at 07:14, Mindovermaster said:

Gratuities which will only be $10 per day.

Nope

 

On 27/07/2022 at 07:14, Mindovermaster said:

I can have room service

Usually not included

 

On 27/07/2022 at 07:14, Mindovermaster said:

An extra $5 worth of tips will have the entire staff scrambling to help you

Not for $5 they wont

 

On 27/07/2022 at 07:14, Mindovermaster said:

Clean sheets and towels every day, and you don’t even have to ask for them

They change bedding every couple of days

 

On 27/07/2022 at 07:14, Mindovermaster said:

If you fall and break a hip on the Princess ship they will upgrade you to a
suite for the rest of your life.

No they won't - they are insured to heck and they will make you comfortable but that's it

 

On 27/07/2022 at 07:14, Mindovermaster said:

And don’t forget, when you die, they just dump you over the side at
no charge

They have mini-morgues

 

But don't worry, I get that it's a joke :) But saying it's "TRUE" is arguable.

  • 4 weeks later...
On 10/08/2022 at 18:15, E.Worm Jimmy said:

Explain what is the issue?

 

In America nursing homes are damn expensive - I can see how this will work.

 

I also know a bunch of elderly who really do spend most of the year on a ship because of convenience and cost.

 

Where do You see the fault?

 

Princess courses are luxury and yet they cost similar to an average nursing home.

 

If you are old but mobile and reasonably healthy - it makes perfect sense. 

 

People have tried to do this in the past and some have succeeded, but the cruise companies hate it and do everything in their power to prevent it.

I've heard of people doing this, but once they actually get ill enough (you know, the main reason why they're in a nursing home), staff are unable to take care of them, and they either end up severely injured or die from complications of illness. It's not a long-term solution. It's cheaper because you don't have staff caring for your every need, but it doesn't work out long term, or too well. Cruse companies will deny booking if they suspect abuse or concerned about safety issues. 

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