Top 10 things your girlfriend shouldnt Know

By Rahul
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Grand Master

Rahul

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Woman often tell themselves that they need to keep some secrets from their men. Well, the inverse is true as well. There are certain things that your woman should never find out about you. For instance, she doesn't need to know about the hot girl who works at your office, and you don't want her to know that you cried for a week after your ex dumped you flat.

After all, you always need to maintain some leverage in your relationship. And as soon as your lady has all the goods on you, the power distribution will have shifted dramatically. Furthermore, keeping some information to yourself might help keep her honest, and it saves you from the risk of public embarrassment.

Here are the top 10 things your gal should never know about you. Keep this valuable info to yourself, but remember this: If your woman can potentially find out about any of the following from another source, you might as well give it up right now. If she discovers any of your little secrets by means of an alternate party, you'll have to deal with her crap over both the information in question and the fact that you tried to cover it up.

NUMBER 10 - YOUR CONQUEST COUNT

Look, you know how many chicks you've bagged and it's probable that some of your friends do, too. But that's where this circle of info should close. It's not necessary to give your current lover a running tally of conquests. Sure, you both want to be safe when it comes to sex. And I encourage you to get yourself tested to prove to both her and yourself that you're clean (of course, she should do the same). But there's no need to divulge numbers -- doing so will upset her and put you at risk of spending the night alone.

NUMBER 9 - YOUR INCOME

As a relationship progresses, it is natural that a couple come to grow familiar with each other's finances. But in the early stages of dating, there is a very sound and reasonable argument for playing your personal monetary value close to the vest. Two words: gold diggers. You could have the bank account of Donald Trump or the debts of Mike Tyson; either way, she shouldn't know. Let her dig you for you first. Then, if you're flush, you can buy her the stuff she likes and such. And if you're broke, she'll either ditch you because you don't buy her stuff, or she'll prove that she's of a worthy character by sticking with you. So keep your Benjamins to yourself.

NUMBER 8 - THE LOCATION OF YOUR PORN STASH

Guys like porn. A lot of chicks do, too. There's no sense, however, in mixing up your fantasy world with the real one. As soon as your lady gets wind that you have a porn stash, there's a good chance that she'll be crying about how she has to compete with Jenna Jameson whenever she sleeps with you. And man, you do not need that kind of stress every time you want to get it on. Worse yet, she could get all crazy and throw out your collection when you aren't looking. Protect your porn, and keep it under wraps.

NUMBER 7 - YOUR WEAKNESSES

Maybe you cry during insurance commercials, or maybe you aren't really as self-confident as you make yourself out to be in public. These frailties don't matter -- as long as she never finds out about them. If she does, she'll start making all sorts of "cute" jokes at your expense. Or the revelation that her man isn't quite the man that she thought he was will put her off of you entirely. Be strong and keep your weaknesses undercover.

NUMBER 6 - YOUR STRIP CLUB EXPERIENCES

Do you like going to peeler bar? Enjoy watching the ladies dance around erotically for your pleasure? Want to maintain the strip club as an open option for an evening's entertainment? Then do not tell your woman that you go there. Don't even concede that you used to go regularly. She'll want to know why you like it, and how much you spend on "tips" for the girls. Even those women who claim to have no problems with strip clubs will somehow twist this habit of yours to their advantage. Simply put, this is a conversational road you do not want to go down.

NUMBER 5 - YOUR WEIRDER FANTASIES

Certain fantasies should be shared and enjoyed together. But you may be into freaky stuff that she just wouldn't understand. Maybe your sexual fantasies involve garden tools or shellfish, and you're just not sure if your lady will appreciate them. Well, there's a good chance that she won't. There are certain daydreams that you and your imagination should take care of on your own, and that you shouldn't divulge to your lady. Once she knows what dark thoughts are running through your head, she may head for the door faster than you can say "gimp."

NUMBER 4 - YOUR MASTURBATION FREQUENCY

Women know that guys masturbate. It's a fact of life. But your woman doesn't need to know the frequency, duration and tools that you use to get off -- it might just pique her curiosity. A guy wants to be alone when he's playing with himself, and you don't need her trying to sneak up on you when you're having some "personal time."

NUMBER 3 - YOUR EX-GIRLFRIEND MEMORABILIA

You might have kept naked pictures of your exes. Maybe you've stashed away their love letters or their panties. Heck, you may have a whole database of their names and personal info printed up on an Excel spreadsheet. Whatever the case, never let your current squeeze find out about your memorabilia. Even if she's willing to leave the past in the past, you can bet that she won't balk at dropping their names as ammo in future fights. For example: "I see then. I guess Melissa would have never done that, would she?" Get the picture? Besides, these are your private memories -- your new girl just doesn't need to know.

NUMBER 2 - YOUR EMBARASSING MOMENTS

We've all had them. And I'm not just talking about light embarrassment, like farting in public or getting caught in a Freudian slip. I'm talking about severe, crippling embarrassment, on the scale of soiling the sheets or having an ex post an indecent picture of you online. If you've suffered this kind of Forbidden Topic humiliation, she should not get a whiff of it. The idea of it and the accompanying visual will surely blow your cool factor right out of the water, and leave your woman killing herself with laughter. It's not the best way to remain slick, and there's a good chance that she'll never look at you in the same light again. You've already lost your pride once over the incident; there's no need to relive the experience.

NUMBER 1 - YOUR CHEATING PAST

Maybe you were just a conniving player back in the day. Or you might have had complicated issues with an ex that drove you into the arms of another woman. No matter what the reasons, no matter how strong your determination is to mend your ways and get a clean start with someone new, your cheating past is something that you never want to reveal to your lady. She'll automatically think that you're looking to score behind her back every chance you get, and you'll never get a fair shake from her again.

HONORABLE MENTION - THE DIRT ON YOUR BUDS

Never dish the dirt about your buddies to your woman. What constitutes dirt? Well, think of it this way: Never tell your girls things about your pals that they wouldn't reveal to their own ladies -- for instance, the 10 things listed above. There are a couple of very good reasons underlying this. The first is that finking them out is a serious violation of the guy code. The second is that you don't want to implicate yourself by association: If you're always going on about how much time your buddy Dave spends at the peelers, she'll start to wonder how much time you spend there with him. Be a man, cover for your brothers and you'll cover for yourself.

Rising Star

Gazza12

Posted
Posted
NUMBER 4 - YOUR MASTURBATION FREQUENCY

Women know that guys masturbate. It's a fact of life. But your woman doesn't need to know the frequency, duration and tools that you use to get off -- it might just pique her curiosity. A guy wants to be alone when he's playing with himself, and you don't need her trying to sneak up on you when you're having some "personal time."

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Why should you need to masturbate when you have a girlfriend to do it for you :ninja: :laugh:

Grand Master

bdsams Veteran

Posted
  • Veteran
Posted
Why should you need to masturbate when you have a girlfriend to do it for you :ninja:?:laugh::

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its obvious that you dont have a gf, hell we all know that there is that 1 week that playground is closed for maintence and sometimes there sick or who knows, hell its a different time and we alaways need to keep our soldiers in top shape

also, every male has had the "If you do that, im not having sex with you"

and of course the male will do it probably becuase its: cool/dangerous/stupid (most of the time, but the most fun)/ it goes fast

Grand Master

leesmithg

Posted
Posted
its obvious that you dont have a gf, hell we all know that there is that 1 week that playground is closed for maintence and sometimes there sick or who knows, hell its a different time and we alaways need to keep our soldiers in top shape

also, every male has had the "If you do that, im not having sex with you"

and of course the male will do it probably becuase its: cool/dangerous/stupid (most of the time, but the most fun)/ it goes fast

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I think this thread is a bit toooooo personal, yes boys/men do masturbate so do girls/women that have boyfriends or girlfriends, it's why whatever created us gave us to do, cut down pregnancy or urges.

So again when I was in my teens I had a gf and still masturbated, you will find also that even in a relationship sexually, masturbation is part of sexual activity.

When you reach 37 which I am nearly in November you will know what I am talking about.

Back to the subject, geez, 1) I know my fiance finds Women sexually attractive (she thinks I don't know this, but I do).

2)I have a thing for Women with hazel eyes, she don't know this.

3)I also have a thing for women with well red hair somewhere not on their head.

4)She don't know I like women that are very tall and not 5'7'' or short women.

5)I can't stand her bloody football team, Liverpool, but I let on that I don't mind them.

6)I hate the fact she can beelch louder than me. She don't know this.

7)She farts smellier than me, ahhhh not on :(

8)She thinks she got a better a-level Maths grade than me, ha I own her grade.

9)She thinks I never (this is lame I know) talked dirty with a Jewish woman I know on the net, a few years back, then on the otherhand if I stuck her yahoo chat name here, you all probably know her also :woot:

10)She thinks I don't know all her passwords to all her crumby e-mail account chat names, what she talks about when she uses the net and she slags me off for earning less than she does, key loggers do come in handy sometimes.

Well..... :whistle:

Enthusiast

Captain Caveman

Posted
Posted
NUMBER 4 - YOUR MASTURBATION FREQUENCY

Women know that guys masturbate. It's a fact of life. But your woman doesn't need to know the frequency, duration and tools that you use to get off -- it might just pique her curiosity. A guy wants to be alone when he's playing with himself, and you don't

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My girlfriend loves to watch!

Turns her right on large.. and before I can finish she involved herself.. gobble gobble. lol

Grand Master

Malisk

Posted
Posted (edited)
NUMBER 4 - YOUR MASTURBATION FREQUENCY

Women know that guys masturbate.

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lol, that made it sound like it's something special guys do.

Hopefully, it doesn't come off as too shocking to men that women do as well.

And being open about your past is good, not bad, at least if asked about it if it's about past sex experiences. I think a relationship shouldn't build on lies and secrecy, at least not when it's about serious stuff like this. You're with her now, and if she loves you, and you both trust each other, you shouldn't have anything to fear.

There's no sense, however, in mixing up your fantasy world with the real one.

Keep in mind that plenty of couples use porn to get aroused and spice up their sex life though, to get new ideas, and so on. I think it's oversimplifying women by saying they'll all get jealous and so on.

These frailties don't matter -- as long as she never finds out about them. If she does, she'll start making all sorts of "cute" jokes at your expense.

Shutting her out of your emotional life sounds very bad to me. Cute jokes be damned, inviting her to your feelings and "frailties" is a wonderful way to see if it's a girl you'll be able to live with or not. If you'll never be able to show her your weaknesses, you're acting like someone you aren't to her, and in a good relationship, both persons are acting like who they are. If you have good self esteem and so, you should also have an easy time dealing with her jokes, and if they're really nasty, why is she your gf?

Overall, you seem to be encouraging a LOT of exclusion in relationships, while I'm more of the opinion to be as open as possible about things. Only then will you know if you're having a relationship building on trust, understanding, compassion and personal chemistry, or a relationship building on secrets. A good partner will have a laugh if you tell her about a strange foot fetish and that seemed weird to her, and then maybe tell you about her weird fantasies in return for opening yourself.

Edited by Jugalator
Community Regular

mienski

Posted
Posted

The male will always keep masturbating! and as Rudy said, she wont want to do it 365 days a year

Besides, we're the only ones who know how to do it right! The whole hand thing just never as good when someone else is trying to do it :laugh:

*cough gobble cough*

Grand Master

NeoXY

Posted
Posted
10)She thinks I don't know all her passwords to all her crumby e-mail account chat names, what she talks about when she uses the net and she slags me off for earning less than she does, key loggers do come in handy sometimes.

Well..... :whistle:

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oh that is low buddy...:laugh: :rofl:

Mentor

linked

Posted
Posted

THANK YOU!

I'm just through with a 9-month relationship I had going where "honesty was the best policy".

This chick needed to know it *all*. What friends I was hanging out with (girls), the kinds of porn I watch, past relationships... how often I got off, with what, thinking about whom, why, where and when.

None of it helped anything as much as it hurt. Every fight we ever got in, she brought up "Well, fine, you can just go hang out with jen" (jen being a good friend). Every time we had sex, she tried talking dirty, using "tricks" she'd seen in the movies she made me watch with her... never wound up good at all.

If I said "Hi" to an ex girlfriend, I got the cold shoulder the whole way home, followed by the innevitable "Do you think she's pretty? Prettier than me?"

Tried telling her that one of my friends was cheating on his girlfriend, too- not only did she spill the beans to his GF, I got accused (again) of infidelity.

Just a bad, bad idea to talk about some things with some girls.

If she wants to know, you can give her bits and peices, but the whole story will never help your case.

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