[Joke] Funny Signs

By jnelsoninjax
in Jokes & Funny Stuff

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Grand Master

jnelsoninjax

Posted
Posted

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:

'Dr. Jones, at your cervix.'

**************************

In a Podiatrist's office:

'Time wounds all heels.'

**************************

On a Septic Tank Truck:

Yesterday's Meals on Wheels

**************************

At a Proctologist's door:

'To expedite your visit, please back in.'

**************************

On a Plumber's truck:

'We repair what your husband fixed.'

**************************

On another Plumber's truck:

'Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.'

**************************

On a Church's Bill board:

'7 days without God makes one weak.'

**************************

At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:

'Invite us to your next blowout.'

**************************

At a Towing company:

'We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.'

**************************

On an Electrician's truck:

'Let us remove your shorts.'

**************************

In a Nonsmoking Area:

'If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.'

**************************

On a Maternity Room door:

'Push. Push. Push.'

**************************

At an Optometrist's Office:

'If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.'

**************************

On a Taxidermist's window:

'We really know our stuff.'

**************************

On a Fence:

'Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!'

**************************

At a Car Dealership:

'The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.'

**************************

Outside a Muffler Shop:

'No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.'

**************************

In a Veterinarian's waiting room:

'Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!'

**************************

At the Electric Company

'We would be delighted if you send in your payment.

However, if you don't, you will be.'

**************************

In a Restaurant window:

'Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.'

**************************

In the front yard of a Funeral Home:

'Drive carefully. We'll wait.'

**************************

At a Propane Filling Station:

'Thank heaven for little grills.'

**************************

And don't forget the sign at a

CHICAGO RADIATOR SHOP:

'Best place in town to take a leak.'

Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:

'Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises

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Grand Master

roadgeek9

Posted
Posted
  Jonathan Nelson said:
Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:

'Dr. Jones, at your cervix.'

**************************

On a Septic Tank Truck:

Yesterday's Meals on Wheels

**************************

On a Plumber's truck:

'We repair what your husband fixed.'

**************************

On another Plumber's truck:

'Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.'

**************************

On a Church's Bill board:

'7 days without God makes one weak.'

**************************

At a Towing company:

'We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.'

**************************

On an Electrician's truck:

'Let us remove your shorts.'

**************************

In a Nonsmoking Area:

'If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.'

**************************

On a Maternity Room door:

'Push. Push. Push.'

**************************

At an Optometrist's Office:

'If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.'

**************************

At a Car Dealership:

'The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.'

**************************

Outside a Muffler Shop:

'No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.'

**************************

At the Electric Company

'We would be delighted if you send in your payment.

However, if you don't, you will be.'

**************************

In a Restaurant window:

'Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.'

**************************

In the front yard of a Funeral Home:

'Drive carefully. We'll wait.'

**************************

And don't forget the sign at a

CHICAGO RADIATOR SHOP:

'Best place in town to take a leak.'

Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:

Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises

:woot:

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